Yessiree FOLKS!!!
I'm here to tell ya, ya GOT to get one of these gently used Ferdinands. They're all nicel lil one owners that came form a very dry, salt free environment down Affiky way, and with that spiffy new PATENTED and LOVINGLY applied Herr Falkon's paint job, well, I hate to spill the beans, cause the bad guys may be listening, but these birds will be 40KPH FASTER!
THat's right, I said it. Do you know what that means to ordinary Ferd driver?
Lemme tell ya, you'll be outrunnin those pesky Yak's with ease.

Vertical penetration is UP UP UP!! Takes 3 seconds off your best turn time too. Higher speed means those big arsed Guns will hit harder too. Think about it, not only will you be the coolest dressed Ferdinand on the Eastern front, why, if you want to slip over to the Euro Theater and beat up some Spits, it'll be a cakewalk! Just dash over to Europe, have your way with a few of the enema's and be back in time for evening stroodle. These things are so efficient with that PATENTED HERR FALKKON paint job, that you have to be real careful about the weight cause it'll seem like that short legged Ferd is making gas. Hard to believe but I'm here to tell ya the straight skinny!!
That PATENTED HERR FALKON paint job also GREATLY increases range and decreases fuel consumption to boot!! Don't know how he does it but Those of us here in the Eastern front think HERR FALKKON'S paint jobs are the berries!! We'll have uncle Joe on a stick in no time!!
The cat's out of the bag now folk's. Hurry and get one before Christmas (oops I used the C word)

Before they're all gone. We're stackin 'em deep and sellin 'em CHEAP!!
Come on down to Uncle Willie's Used Ferdinand sales and we'll fix ya right up on an easy installment plan. No money down. You get our famous OKLAHOMA guarantee too. You blow it up or if it blows up on ya?? No problem. You keep all the parts that are left.
